Listen up: Cristiano can now be yours.
You guys, a very important event recently occurred.
Harold Cunningham / Via Getty Images
Cristiano Ronaldo aka your boo, has broken up with his supermodel girlfriend, Irina Shayk, aka your nemesis.
K bye, Irina.
Carlos Alvarez / Via Getty Images
Other people might be shocked at this news. They did, after all, date for five years.
Denis Doyle / Via Getty Images
But you weren't surprised. Cristiano and Irina were never gonna last. Know why?
Philipp Schmidli / Via Getty Images